Perry's Perspective
by Paper Pearls
Summary: A multi-chaptered Elliox romance set from S5E21 onwards. Perry comes to work drunk and Elliot's reaction changes the dynamic of their relationship.
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first Scrubs fanfiction and it is set from episode 521, "My Fallen Idol", onwards. Dr Cox and Jordan have recently split up and Elliot's relationship with Keith is on the rocks. The pairing is Elliot/Dr Cox. **

**OoOoO**

"I can't believe that you thought that The Todd was gay." Keith shook his head, a knowing smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. There had been a time when Elliot had found this expression attractive, but now it set her on edge; she felt foolish enough without her boyfriend rubbing it in, and the atmosphere in Sacred Heart had been subdued since the deaths of the transplant patients. Death itself was a frequent occurance at the hospital, but it was rare to see Dr Cox so obviously distressed by anything.

"Well he isn't _not _gay, Keith, and now really isn't the time!" As she lifted her charts from the counter and walked around the corridor, Elliot felt calmed by her outburst. She took a deep breath and focussed on the first of her patients; a forty-one year old woman who been suffering from sickness, causes unknown.

Walking in a manner that she hoped exuded confidence, Elliot continued down the corridor until she reached the room. On the bed sat a cheerful looking woman with dark hair, engrossed in a beauty magazine. The patient looked up expectantly as Elliot entered the room.

"Mrs Black? I'm Dr Elliot Reid and I'm going to be overseeing your tests." She stepped to the side of the bed.

"Oh please, call me Karen." At this Elliot couldn't help smile- having a friendly patient always put her in a good mood because it was always especially rewarding to help someone that was nice.

"Alright, I just need to ask some routine questions as an indication of what tests we should run first, okay Karen?" The patient nodded and adjusted the blankets as Elliot flicked through the file. Beyond a broken arm, there was no history of illness. "You passed out at work this morning. Can you remember how you felt before that?"

"I was too hot, and I kept thinking that I needed some fresh air. Then I felt like I was going to be sick, and I tried to sit down, but then I just..." She shrugged and Elliot looked at her sympathetically.

"And has anything like this happened before, at home?"

"Yeah, but I never thought much of it because it hasn't affected me this badly. It's not serious, is it?" Despite her kneejerk urge to comfort Karen, Elliot refrained from promising anything.

"We'll do some tests- strictly routine- and hopefully the results will be conclusive." She wrote about her findings on the clipboard to give Karen a moment to calm down, and just as Elliot opened her mouth to ask another question, her pager sounded. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Thank you Dr Reid." Karen's words barely registered with Elliot as she saw the room number- one of Dr Cox's patients who was in for observation, nothing complicated. As she ran towards her destination, Elliot dodged a questioning intern and nearly collided with JD as she arrived. JD remained still in the doorway, and Elliot placed a hand on his back in order to steady herself.

"Keep going, JD. What are you doing?" When her friend still did not move, Elliot peered around him. Dr Cox swayed dangerously, fiddling with an IV in a way that showed none of the wealth of his medical experience. At first she didn't understand what it was that caused his strange behaviour, but as soon as Dr Cox spoke, the truth became clear.

"Newbie, will you give me a little trouble? I'm having some help here." The fluids spilled from the tubing, and for a moment the only sound in the room was the splatter as they hit the linoleum flooring. Elliot was the first to recover. Slipping around JD, she connected the IV tube and set about convincing the patient that nothing was amiss.

"Sorry about that, Mr Mathews; there was a fault with your IV." She nodded briskly, and when Dr Cox made to speak she continued. "It's been fixed. I'll have someone clean this up."

With that, Elliot linked her arm through Dr Cox's and gestured for JD to follow as she frogmarched their boss into what had once been her favourite supply closet. It was crowded, but the three of them made it into Elliot's old hiding place. She doubted very much that hiding in here would make Dr Cox feel any better about himself. Professionally there was no way she could ever condone coming to work whilst drunk, yet Elliot found herself sympathising and gave his arm a gentle squeeze.

"What do we do now?" JD looked petrified, and even in the poor lighting Elliot could see that he was pale. It must be hard for him seeing his role model making such a colossal mistake, but she would comfort him later.

"By any chance Barbie, is there- do you keep- have scotch in here?" The words were horribly slurred, and Elliot winced as she smelled the alcohol on his breath.

"No, Dr Cox, we don't, and that's because this is a _hospital_." Inwardly Elliot was panicking as she had no clue how to handle this situation. Medical emergencies? Dr Reid could be relied upon. A personal crisis? Elliot, who had arrived from Connecticut with more emotional baggage than she could afford a shrink to handle, was uncertain about how to proceed. _What if she did the wrong thing?_ But they couldn't remain here indefinitely. "We can't let anyone see him like this. Go to the nurses' station and get Carla to call a cab."

JD's relief at being allowed to leave the crowded little room was evident. As the door closed behind him, Elliot wondered what she would do with Dr Cox until the taxi arrived. He was no steadier on his feet, and so she wrapped an arm round his waist to prevent him from falling. If he fell and hit his head then the whole of Sacred Heart would find out about his misdemeanour.

"Barbie.... what are you doing?" Dr Cox shook his head in either confusion or revulsion. "And where are we?"

"Hiding in a supply closet. I'm holding you up because you're too drunk to stand up straight." Her tone was flat- Elliot was suddenly too tired to even consider rebuking Dr Cox for his actions. Seeing him brought so low was incredibly sad; he was proud, talented and not so long ago she had thought of him as invincible. _JD still did_. Maybe not living up to their expectations had made him feel worse.

"Hmm." It seemed that Dr Cox's liquor addled mind could think of any arguments, as he ceased resisting her efforts and wrapped his own arm around her shoulders.

"Everything's going to be fine. We'll get you home really soon, and you can take a nap, have a shower, eat a nice hot dinner and tomorrow you can come back to work and there won't be a problem." There was no reply, and Elliot wondered who it was that she was trying to reassure. "Everything's going to be fine."

The door swung open, and JD looked completely nervous about what it was that he would see.

"Taxi's here." Elliot sighed in relief, but apprehension coloured her thoughts as she realised there was still the problem of how to get Dr Cox out of the hospital without anyone noticing how drunk he was. Before JD could argue, she moved out into the corridor and positioned herself so that Dr Cox was sandwiched between them. Holding her chart in front of them, Elliot forced herself to think positively.

"Dr Cox, two of our patients are displaying similar symptoms, but we don't know what it could be. Do you have any ideas?" She continued the conversation, wishing that JD would interject more often to make their ploy more convincing.

At first she was thankful when Dr Cox remained silent- the last thing they needed was his drunken rambling if this was to work- but it dawned on Elliot that perhaps it would be better if the older man showed some signs of life, or at least tried to mimic normalcy. Turk was waiting in the elevator, holding the doors open. Like JD, he looked shocked by the revelation that Dr Cox was drunk.

"How's he doing?" The descent began and Elliot prayed that nobody else would get in the lift. She didn't know how to answer Turk's question.

"JD, will you cover my shift? I don't think we should leave him to get home alone." Elliot refrained from adding that he would probably take a taxi to the nearest bar instead of his apartment.

"Uh... sure." The answer was lacklustre at best. Turk watched the exchange incredulously, turning to his best friend.

"You're not going with him? JD, you can go to Dr Cox's apartment now."

"I think Elliot's pretty much got it covered." There was an underlying note of aggression in his voice, and JD looked like an animal backed into a corner. She quashed the urge to cry out _'I have no fricking clue what to do with him!_' in the squeaky voice that Dr Cox had always found irritating, instead wondering how being abandoned by JD would make him feel. She frowned at her friend, holding Dr Cox a little more tightly. However, if he had registered the conversation, then Dr Cox made no acknowledgement.

They reached the ground floor, and once more Elliot began the routine of asking him questions about a patient with a rash. _The doors were just ahead of them_. Her heart hammered in her chest as Elliot increased their pace. Dr Cox wobbled precariously as the trio made their way down the stairs, and Elliot all but pushed him into the taxi. She turned to face JD.

"Here, take this. If you can't look after Dr Cox then look after Karen Black for me instead." Pressing the clipboard into his arms, Elliot ignored the look of hurt on JD's features as she climbed into the yellow cab after Dr Cox. He stared ahead seeing nothing. Giving the address, Elliot arranged herself limply in the seat, watching as Sacred Heart disappeared from view. _It was going to be a long day_.

When the driver pulled in beside the apartment block, Elliot handed over the fare and helped Dr Cox out of the cab. She felt as though she was alone as the taxi merged with the traffic, leaving her and Dr Cox standing on the sidewalk. Hesitantly, she started walking up to the door of his home, but when Elliot realised that she wasn't being followed, she stopped.

"Dr Cox?" She bounded back down the stairs and linked their arms once more. "Perry?"

He frowned slightly, looking down at her. Elliot smiled, hoping that her uncertainty didn't show too noticeably.

"Come on, Perry." This time he responded to the light tug on his arm and followed Elliot up the stairs. She keyed in the code to get into the apartment block, thankful that some of JD's more stalker-like outbursts had proven unforgettable, and they got into the elevator. By the time they were outside his apartment, Elliot's shoulders were aching from supporting his weight.

When it became clear that Dr Cox had no interest in opening his front door, Elliot reached into the deep pockets of his white coat and withdrew the front door key. She pushed it open and watched, helpless, as he made a beeline for the drink cabinet.

"Why not have some water instead?" His back was to her, and no response was given save for the sigh of pleasure as he swallowed the scotch. "Or juice? Or not..."

Elliot closed the door behind her and headed for the kitchen. The cupboards were unfamiliar, and so progress was slow, but she made him a sandwich, salad and a drink of orange juice for with it. She carried the tray to the coffee table and set it down before him.

"Perry, I have to get back to the hospital now." He didn't even look at her. _Would JD have been able to do anything she hadn't?_ "If you need anything then give me a call- you have my pager number. Get some rest, okay?"

Elliot squeezed his shoulder before leaving the apartment. She didn't know what else to do.

**OoOoO**

**Thanks for reading. Please review. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to both of my reviewers- I hope that I don't disappoint.**

**OoOoO**

Taking a moment to appreciate the tranquil atmosphere of the small park beside the hospital, Elliot inhaled the fresh air and considered the phrase 'everything looks better in the morning'. It was a warm, sunny day, which had automatically put her in a good mood, something that wearing light summer clothes complimented- looking good was always fun. Dr Cox would have slept off the scotch and would be back in the hospital, unflappable and invulnerable as always, perhaps with a headache induced temper, but even that wouldn't be too different from everyday life. Feeling especially optimistic, Elliot decided to ask Keith for lunch. Their relationship had become quite tense, but she knew that most relationships had their rough patches.

Elliot caught sight of Carla chatting with a group of nurses on their break. She dashed across the car park towards her friend.

"Carla, hey. Can I talk to you for a second?" The thought that Laverne had a sixth sense for fresh gossip sprung to mind once again as the older nurse fixed her with a curious stare. Elliot shifted awkwardly from foot to foot, but still Laverne did not relent. "What are you looking at? Is it _that_ strange that I want to talk to my friend? Because I _do_ have friends and I don't care what you think about me."

The group of nurses looked at Elliot as though she had gone completely crazy. Perhaps she had overreacted a little. She had become so shrill that the last few words had bled into one another.

"Woah, Elliot you need to calm down." Carla patted Elliot's back and propelled her into the building, whispering something that pacified her co-workers. Once they were out of earshot, Elliot allowed herself to ask the question that had burned through her thoughts since she had woken up.

"So, where's Dr Cox at?" After seeing him in such a dreadful state, Elliot was eager to see him restored to his former glory. She remembered referring to him as Perry yesterday and told herself off for the bizarre wish to do so again.

"He... he isn't here yet." From Carla's tone it was clear that she didn't expect to see him at all, but nevertheless Elliot was shocked.

"What do you mean? His shift was supposed to start over an hour ago." Elliot kicked a Hazmat bin in frustration. She had thought, for some reason that no longer seemed logical, that her intervention would be enough to get Dr Cox back on track. "Frick!"

"Why are you so angry, blonde doctor?" The Janitor rounded the corner and folded his arms in exasperation. Elliot floundered under the intensity of his gaze, but a sharp prod from Carla reminded her to speak.

"Uh, because... JD stole my... my lunch yesterday, and I'm really, really hungry because I haven't eaten since." The Janitor's expression became altogether more menacing, and Elliot immediately felt guilty.

"Who does that mousse-haired little nuisance think he is? Don't worry, blonde doctor; I'll take care of this." Lifting his trusty mop, the Janitor continued in the direction of the exit. Elliot fleetingly wondered if he was going to JD's house and felt a twinge of guilt. _Who knew what the Janitor was thinking_.

"Oops?" Elliot bit her lip and Carla shrugged in response.

"So if Dr Cox isn't here...?" Following her morning routine, Elliot lifted the first clipboard from the mountain of charts in her inbox. She would also need to check up on Karen.

"He's at home and he's still drinking. Jordan went over this morning to see if he could take Jack to playschool. I've got to go and check up on the interns now. I honestly don't know why they think oranges are a good enough substitute for veins- Rex was just ramming it in, yesterday." Elliot made a sympathetic noise that died in her throat when she saw who was now standing in front of the.

"Do you ladies know who else was ramming it in last night?" The Todd winked and had it not been for the Hippocratic Oath, Elliot would have killed him then and there. He held up his hand in anticipation, "Up high for the Big Dog."

"No, Todd." Before he could argue, she had stepped behind the nurse's station and logged on to her computer. One of the many benefits of being friends with Carla was that she was capable of giving a simple, no nonsense refusal when Elliot found herself about to give in. "Elliot, can you be in the cafeteria in about two hours?"

"Sure Carla." Trying not to let her disappointment at Dr Cox's absence show, Elliot forced her demeanour to remain decidedly upbeat as she did her rounds.

When she had seen all of her patients, Elliot realised that someone would have to take responsibility for those officially under the care of Dr Cox. Since she was private practice, it was no longer strictly within her purview, but equally her superiors could do little to punish her for bending the rules. Knowing that it was the right thing to do, Elliot made her way towards the first bed.

"Yes, dear?" An old lady ceased knitting and focussed her attention on Elliot, who realised that she needed a plausible excuse for Dr Cox's absence. Her mind went blank. _Frick_.

"Hi, I'm Dr Reid and I'm going to be covering for Dr Cox, who is... um..." Elliot coughed, and decided to try and distract her patient. "Say, have you by any chance seen... my stethoscope?"

"It's around your neck, Dr Reid." The patient, Mrs Murphy, did not look amused.

"Oh, so it is! Imagine that..." Elliot waved her hands in a dismissive gesture and laughed, although the sound was far too high pitched to seem even slightly genuine.

"If it's all the same to you dear, I'd rather have Dr Cox back." The patient continued knitting, a clear dismissal, and Elliot felt her heart sink.

"Actually, that won't be possible because he is in Acapulco." Mrs Murphy's eyebrows rose in disbelief, and Elliot cursed herself for being so unimaginative. "Now, I have to go and see another patient but if you need anything at all then... I'm your girl."

Elliot turned on her heel and walked away as quickly as she could without losing her dignity and made sure that all of Dr Cox's patients were doing well before heading for the cafeteria. JD came out of a patient's room just as she passed it, and Elliot remembered her earlier dealings with his arch-nemesis, the Janitor.

"JD, hi. How did things go yesterday with Mrs Black?" She fell into step beside him, his familiar presence somewhat soothing after the stress of spreading rumours about Dr Cox's whereabouts.

"She's doing okay. Her test results were sent up to the lab last night and you should have them back by tomorrow morning. She was a little freaked out by getting her blood taken, but an appearance of multi-ethnic Siamese doctor sorted that out." JD grinned, and although his cheer was usually infectious, Elliot was determined to find out what he was going to do to help Dr Cox.

"Cool- thanks, that's great, JD. Is there anything you want to ask me?" Elliot remained outwardly nonchalant as she checked another chart, but she was worried that JD was going to abandon his mentor during his time of need.

"Yeah, there's something quite important actually." JD ushered her into an empty room for privacy and Elliot wondered how she could have doubted his devotion to Dr Cox. "Do you think that they'll ever give out banana milk and strawberry milk in the cafeteria? I thought about putting in a complaint, but doesn't that seem a little extreme to you?" He continued, oblivious to Elliot's shock. "Maybe they could make a delicious fusion of the two..."

With that, JD left for his fantasy world, a rapt expression on his features. Elliot had no idea how to set about fixing his priorities, or his relationship with Dr Cox. She felt woefully inadequate as the realisation that her to do list had grown spectacularly in the space of one morning.

"And they'd start an adorable little mutant army..." JD blinked as Elliot snapped her fingers in front of his face.

"Come on- we have to go to the cafeteria and work out what we're going to do to get Dr Cox back on his feet." Sounding altogether more confident than she felt, Elliot marched out of the room. It didn't look like JD was going to be much help.

**OoOoO**

After an extremely busy morning, Elliot was more than ready for a nice, relaxing lunch with her boyfriend, Keith. She placed the red plastic tray on the table, beside his, and attempted to push her many stresses to the back of her mind and focus on him for a little.

"Hey Elliot, how are you?" He flashed a perfect white smile that made Elliot's heart melt a little. She had expected superficial conversation, but now it seemed that Keith was perceptive enough to know that something was bothering her.

"Oh, you know. It's been hard covering for Dr Cox, and I'm pretty worried about him to tell you the truth." She sighed and stabbed her baked potato with the fork. It made her so sad to think of Dr Cox sitting around and drinking in his apartment all day long. "Will you come with me to check up on him tonight?"

She hadn't planned on requesting Keith's company, but doing this alone was a little overwhelming. His grin faded a little, and Elliot instantly regretted asking.

"How come? I mean, can't Dr Dorian or someone else do it?" Keith began eating his macaroni with gusto, no longer interested in the topic of conversation.

"You know what? Just forget I said anything." Elliot picked dejectedly at her salad, looking over to the table where her closest friends sat. She was glad that Carla had organised a rota and taken such a keen interest, and that Turk was fully involved too. _Why couldn't Keith ever support her like that?_ Lifting the apple from her tray, Elliot stood and decided to go and see Karen.

**OoOoO**

Her journey to the apartment was much quicker without having the drunken weight of Dr Cox to half carry, and Elliot knocked smartly on the door. All day she had wanted to visit Dr Cox and see him with her own eyes, but now that she was here, Elliot found that she wasn't certain that she could achieve anything for him. The door opened, and Carla gave her a sad smile.

"Hey Elliot. He's still drinking." She looked past Carla and saw Dr Cox sitting in almost exactly the same spot she had left him in the previous night. The only difference was that two empty whisky bottles now rested on the tabletop. "Want me to stay with you?"

"No, I'll be fine. You go and spend time with Turk, and rest, because my little niece or nephew needs a nap." The two women hugged, and despite her brave words, Elliot didn't want to let go of Carla, who was always so fearless.

"Thanks Elliot. Give JD a call later at the hospital." With that, Carla left Elliot alone with Dr Cox. Elliot adjusted her skirt awkwardly before sitting down beside him.

The silence in the apartment was oppressive. Dr Cox drank deeply from the glass in his hand.

"So... do you want to talk about it?" As unlikely as it was, Elliot felt that she ought to try the direct route. Dr Cox didn't respond, staring blankly ahead. "Are you hungry? Cause I know that I am, and if you've been drinking that all day then you will be too."

Elliot went into the kitchen and, thankful for something to do, made a simple meal of spaghetti Bolognese. Cooking passed the time, and every few minutes she'd check to see that he was still there. Elliot put two portions on plates, one for her and one for Dr Cox, and put the rest in a Tupperware she found so that if he got hungry there would be something decent to eat. Carrying the steaming plates into the lounge, Elliot noticed a dim flicker of curiosity behind his eyes.

"You've got to eat something, Perry." She balanced one of the plates on his lap and watched as he began to eat, made slightly clumsy by the large quantity of alcohol working its way through his system.

They finished the meal in silence and Elliot took the plates back through to the kitchen. He continued to ignore the glass of water she had pointedly placed before him. If anyone could get Dr Cox to stop drinking, it was JD. She pulled her phone from her pocket and dialled the number for the nurses' station.

"Hi, it's Elliot speaking. I'm over at Dr Cox's and he's had dinner, so all you need to do it keep him company for a couple of hours." There was a tense moment in which JD didn't speak. Elliot watched as Dr Cox refilled his glass for the third time since she had arrived. _Don't let him down, JD_.

"Elliot, I can't do it. I'm not okay with Dr Cox showing up drunk." The line went dead and Elliot wanted to cry. What was she supposed to say to Dr Cox- _the guy who worships you is completely pissed off, so you should get even more upset_? She sat back down beside him.

"JD can't make it- he's... he can't make it." Tentatively, Elliot took Dr Cox's free hand between both of her own. "But I'm going to stay with you, Perry."

Elliot rested her head against his shoulder, determined to let Dr Cox know that he could depend upon her.

**OoOoO**

**Thanks for reading. Please review.**


	3. Chapter 3

**OoOoO**

It had been almost midnight by the time Dr Cox had fallen asleep, and so Elliot was more than a little tired when she arrived at work the next morning. Every time she thought of JD she couldn't help but picture Dr Cox sprawled across his couch, unshaven and looking like a vagabond. _Why didn't he show up? Perry had obviously needed him. _Realising that she had internally referred to Dr Cox by his first name, Elliot blew her fringe from her eyes and continued on her way to the lab, unwilling to examine her thoughts.

"Franklin, hi." Elliot stepped into the laboratory and towards the Asian doctor. There was nobody better suited to his work in the lab, and he was always friendly.

"Elliot, you're here for Mrs Black's results, right?" He opened a manila folder and placed the contents on the table. "Sorry, but there was nothing conclusive at all- maybe you should try having a more detailed physical and take it from there."

Elliot couldn't help but let her disappointment show. "When you find something, I'll give you priority, alright?" She nodded.

"Thanks." It was a generous offer, but still Elliot couldn't hide her disappointment. For the duration of the walk to Mrs Black's room, she was subdued. The hopeful expression on her patient's face only made Elliot feel worse.

"Dr Reid, did you get my test results back yet?" As she spoke, Mrs Black bunched the blankets between her fingers, belying her obvious tension. "Oh god, it's not good news, is it?"

"Actually Karen, we don't have any news yet. I'll schedule some more tests for this afternoon, and we'll take it from there. In the mean time, is there anyone I can call for you? Some company might help." She watched as Karen's eyes filled up with tears, wordlessly handing over a paper tissue.

"I'm sorry, it's just that I'm divorced, and my parents live all the way in Texas." She wiped her eyes. "It seems a bit much just to call up new friends out of the blue- I moved here after I left my husband."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. I'll check up on you again soon, and in the mean time I want you to think about calling someone, okay? Things like this can bring people closer together; there was this one time one of my dad's friends, Mr Malawski, was a patient of his- he's a doctor too- and so my mom slept with him right there on the hospital bed. It turns out Mr Malawski just had indigestion, not a heart attack..." Karen laughed weakly, making Elliot realise that perhaps it hadn't been the most relevant of stories after all. At least she had made her patient smile again.

"Right, well I'm not sure if I've made any of those types of friends yet, but fingers crossed." The teasing look Karen shot her let Elliot know that her anecdote had not rendered her a complete freak of nature in the eyes of her patient.

"I'll come back before lunch." Her mood considerably worse than it had been when she had woken up, Elliot went to the nurse's station and started filling out the paperwork for her patient.

"Hey Elliot, do you know who else needs a full physical?" Looking up from the form, Elliot saw the Todd sitting on the counter opposite her, grinning as though he believed he had said something particularly witty- the sad part, Elliot knew, was that he did. His hand was held up in the position for a high five.

"Yeah Todd, if you make one more remark like that then by the time that I'm finished with you, _you_ will be the one who needs a physical." Carla slammed the paperwork Todd had requested down in front of him, expression deadly serious. To her amazement, Todd remained quiet. If there was a way for her to become as brave as Carla, then Elliot knew that she would take it. Sensing that Elliot wanted to talk, the nurse gravitated back towards her.

"Carla, I feel really bad for Mrs Black. She has nobody with her, and she just moved here." Elliot also felt particularly bad for someone else who was suffering. "Is Turk with Dr Cox just now?"

"Yeah, he is." They considered what the apartment would be like. Elliot pictured Turk making a series of unsuccessful ice breakers before switching on the television and felt frustrated by how inadequate it would be in making Dr Cox feel better. _Could she do more than Turk? _Ignoring the doubt in the pit of her stomach, Elliot decided to bite the bullet.

"JD's supposed to be with him next, isn't he?" Carla nodded, remaining silent as she gauged Elliot's mood. "I'll cover for him."

"Don't you have a date with Keith tonight?" It never ceased to surprise her how Carla could spend so much energy on work and keep tabs on the personal life of almost every member of staff.

"Oh, Keith will understand." In spite of her happy-go-lucky tone, Elliot wasn't so sure, but she felt that it would be wrong to go out for dinner as though there was nothing amiss when someone as important to the Sacred Heart family needed her help. She had just started thinking of ways in which to pacify her boyfriend when he materialised seemingly out of nowhere.

"You're sure Keith will understand what?" He placed a hand on the side of her waist and smiled in a way that gave Elliot a little more confidence about how her words would be received. Subtle as always, Carla managed to blend back in to her workspace. Standing on her tiptoes, Elliot gave Keith a brief kiss.

"Well, I'm going to have to reschedule tonight. I'm so sorry, but-" When she tried to kiss Keith again, he moved away.

"What about us, Elliot?" His smile turned into a pout and in that moment Elliot was hard pressed not to think of her boyfriend as a petulant child. Still, Keith had been sweet to her so she took a deep breath and remained calm.

"Neither one of us is having a personal crisis, Keith. During my time at this hospital Dr Cox has given me so much, whether I realised it at the time or not, and I need to help him work through this. We can change our reservations for next week." Keith nodded reluctantly. It had gone better than she had hoped.

"Okay." He lifted the chart he had come for and disappeared around the corner. Elliot refused to return the knowing look Carla was sending her- Keith had been good about her cancelling the dinner they had planned, and it would be disloyal for her to express her doubts at present- and was elated when her pager sounded. At least, she was until she saw that one of Dr Cox's patients needed her help. There weren't going to be enough hours in the day... Elliot sighed. _Frick_.

**OoOoO**

When she had checked up on all of her patients, Elliot finally headed to the cafeteria for lunch. She saw that Keith was sitting with the other interns and couldn't help but feel guilty about the sense of relief that she wouldn't need to sit through an awkward lunch with him- it would be her fault that it would have been awkward in the first place. Sitting down beside Turk and Carla, Elliot was glad that she had them around her. If it wasn't for Carla, she would have lost her head long ago, and Turk could almost always put a smile on her face.

"Hey guys, I'm sorry to interrupt." They ceased embracing, and Carla was the first to pull back. Turk whimpered at the loss of contact with his wife.

"Don't be silly, Elliot, you're having a rough day. You could just turf some of those patients to another doctor." There was a hint of uncertainty in Carla's voice, which confirmed what Elliot herself had suspected.

"No. I don't think that'd be right." They fell silent for a moment until JD joined them, his tray carrying an empty plate.

"Damn that Janitor and his evil ways..." JD stared dejectedly at the line of people progressing through the lunch hall, and Elliot turned in time to see the Janitor walking towards her.

"Here's yesterday's lunch, Blonde Doctor." He placed a tray of congealed looking mush beside her. It didn't smell especially nice. Elliot wrinkled her nose and tried her best to sound grateful.

"Oh, um... thank you. That was kind of you." She kicked Turk under the table to prevent him from laughing.

"No problem. It's all in a good day's work." Even after he had left, JD remained on guard.

"What was that about?" Turk was, as always, protective of his Vanilla Bear. Carla rolled her eyes.

"Nothing! Why would you expect me to know that, Turk? I mean really, it's you that knows everything about what JD may or may not have done to deserve not being given lunch, not me!" Elliot fell silent as she realised that several pairs of eyes were fixed upon her. She had positively screeched the last part.

"Actually Elliot, I _was_ talking to JD." The two men nodded in unison.

"Right." The best way to shift attention from herself was to talk about something more topical. Her mother had used this method many times with some serious results. "So Turk, how's Dr Cox doing?"

"Since I don't have lunch any more, I'm going to check up on my patients." JD stood and left the table as quickly as Elliot could ever recall having seen him move. Turk coughed to regain her attention.

"He's... um... not so good."

"Is he any better than before?" Elliot knew that food and holding hands wasn't much, but she couldn't help but let herself hope.

"Not really, no." _What could she do?_

"But tonight you can check up on him. He's having a hard time-" Carla was cut off midsentence as Todd came to stand by their table.

"You know what else is having a hard time? My penis! Up high for the Big Dog." Turk made as though he was going to reach out, but Carla cut him off with a severe look.

"Baby?" When Carla didn't relent, Turk hung his head. He looked so forlorn that Elliot almost pitied him.

"Fine, but that's all for today." The two surgeons shared a high five with child-like enthusiasm and left for their scheduled operations.

"Did you see the way JD left as soon as I mentioned Dr Cox?" She was certain that it hadn't been her imagination, but still Elliot wanted to check what Carla thought of the whole situation. Of the two of them, Carla could be depended upon to remain level headed.

"I know... Elliot, you shouldn't blame yourself for the fact that he isn't better yet. You did everything you could for him yesterday, and you'll do everything you can today. That's what matters." Once again, Carla had managed to work out her biggest insecurity and manage to reassure her.

"I hope so, Carla."

**OoOoO**

Elliot spent almost every spare moment of the next two weeks with Dr Cox, making sure that he ate, washed and went to bed at night. She told him about her life, updating him more to have something to fill the silence with than because of any real interest on his behalf. She told him about her patients, her brother, the latest hospital gossip, and made sure that he listened to all of the unintelligible messages that Jack left on the phone. She even sat with him as he digested JD's visit.

When she saw that he had emerged from his catatonic state, Elliot was more relieved than she was willing to admit to herself. She returned home to the familiar surroundings of her own flat, woefully neglected and with its cupboards under-stocked, and tried to ignore the nagging voice, which sounded suspiciously like one Percival Ulysses Cox, that told her now his life was back on track, it was time to fix her own.

Tomorrow, Dr Cox would return to work and her days would go back to revolving around her patients and Keith. Thinking of her boyfriend didn't bring the spark that it once had, which didn't make sense, because Keith was wonderful, attractive...

Exhausted, Elliot pulled her duvet over her head and went to sleep.

**OoOoO**

**Thanks for reading. Please review.**


	4. Chapter 4

**I know nothing about medicine, so forgive the inevitable mistakes.**

**OoOoO**

A lot had gone wrong in the past couple of weeks; Karen Black was suffering from breast cancer, Keith was barely talking to Elliot and as a result of the latter, her mother once more suspected that she was a closet lesbian. For these reasons, Elliot decided to embrace the main positive in her life; Dr Cox would be back in Sacred Heart in under an hour.

She walked towards the nurses' station with a spring in her step and smiled at everyone who caught her eye. On the counter was a large cardboard box, and everybody seemed to be holding a small black package wrapped in cellophane. In the middle of the flurry of activity surrounding the desk stood JD, proudly wearing a t-shirt that carried the motif '_Welcome Back Coxer'_. Seeing him so obviously enthused, Elliot didn't think about what a bizarre gesture he was making, only how good it was to see things back to the way they should be; JD fawning over his mentor.

"Oh hey Elliot, I didn't think that they made them small enough for you, so I got a children's shirt especially." JD tossed the package towards her with surprising accuracy. It was, in his bumbling way, a kind gesture.

"Thank you!" Elliot wondered what Dr Cox would make of all of this. She shrugged off her lab coat and pulled the t-shirt over her top.

"Now, when he finally gets here, I want everyone assembled in the cafeteria and ready to sing _this_ song by John Sebastian. The lyrics are on the piece of paper that was in the bag with your t-shirt. Does anyone have any questions?" He looked around the room and caught sight of Carla's raised hand. "Yes?"

"Bambi, do you really think that Dr Cox is going to want this much of a fuss? I mean, you're probably more in touch with his feelings than he is." Carla looked around her for support, but before anyone else could chime in, JD continued speaking.

"Okay, I'm not taking any more questions." JD hopped down from the chair he had been standing on and stage-whispered emphatically. "Firstly, Carla, I paid two dollars extra to get you a maternity t-shirt, and secondly, we need to show Perry that we all care."

Even though he spoke determinedly, Elliot could see the look of uncertainty in his eyes. Perhaps it wasn't the best idea in the history of the world, but it wasn't the worst either.

"You know what? I think he's going to love it." She caught Carla's eye and they struggled not to laugh. "I'm just going to check up on a couple of things, and then I'll be in the cafeteria completely ready to sing."

Of course Dr Cox wasn't going to love it, but Elliot knew that he liked to tolerate such things. It was simply the dysfunctional way things worked.

**OoOoO**

It had been great having Dr Cox prowling the halls of Sacred Heart again, reducing interns to tears, and making sarcastic quips whenever possible, but Elliot had forgotten just how frustrating he could be. She was growing increasingly stressed about Mrs Black, whose predicament had done nothing to dent her kindly demeanour, and now her friends didn't believe her that Dr Cox was scared of mistreating a patient. To top it off, he had made fun of her attempts to help him get back into his routine.

She stood beside Mrs Goldstein, wondering what had caused her to misread the signals so completely. For the past two weeks her life had revolved around making sure Dr Cox didn't drink himself to death, and today he had publically humiliated her for no discernable reason. There was a tap on her shoulder. Elliot turned around.

"Uh, Elliot?" Doug shuffled nervously from one foot to the other, and she tilted her head to one side to let him know that she was listening. "I'm going to the toilet."

"Uh, Doug?" She knew that it was cruel to mimic him, but Elliot was too tired and cranky to care. "I don't care. Now scram!"

There was something satisfying about watching Doug scuttle away from her, fumbling with the door handle in his eagerness to escape. Slow, sarcastic applause sounded, and Elliot knew without looking that her little outburst had been witnessed by Dr Cox. _Frick_. He was going to be insufferable.

"Well, would you look at that? Doctor Barbie's all grown up." He checked Mrs Goldstein's chart and watched as Elliot injected her dosage of medication into her IV. "Is she doing alright?"

"Yeah, she's stable. Now unless you have anything useful to say, leave me alone." Elliot compared Mrs Goldstein's current condition to what was written on the chart, doing her best to ignore Dr Cox. He stood with his hands clasped behind his head, and she had a horrible feeling that he wasn't going to obey her request.

"Now listen here, because I'm only going to say this once; it does matter –it _always_ will matter – that people view me as invincible. As even _you_ will be aware, I am an egomaniac, and I happen to get off on the... well, the worship and awe with which you lesser doctors regard me is... it's like sex, frankly; sex, mixed with coffee, steak and the tears of a certain little girl who puts mousse in her hair and continually attempts to invade my privacy."

"I see." Elliot didn't see, but she didn't know how else to respond to this disturbing analogy.

"It is _ve-e-ery_ important to me that I go back to being _that guy_; the one everybody scurries to for help in an emergency, and if I hide in your size zero skirts then I can't." Dr Cox watched her intently, making Elliot feel a little uncomfortable. He had belittled and humiliated her after all the time and energy she had put into helping him. The explanation wasn't good enough, but she didn't want to hinder his progress.

Ignoring her dilemma, Elliot took the chart from him and marked down that she had given Mrs Goldstein the appropriate dosage. She sniffed and attempted to keep the tears back. Frick. She would not cry in front of him. She would not-

"Let's go for a coffee. What do you say, Barbie?" The suggestion shocked Elliot so much that she looked up, forgetting her ploy of being busy. She fumbled with her pen as she attempted to formulate an answer.

"That'd be okay, I guess." Elliot placed the chart on the end of the bed and followed Dr Cox downstairs to the deserted cafeteria, wondering what he was thinking of. He gestured towards her usual table and Elliot sat, watching as he used the coffee machine. She was surprised to note that he had made the coffee exactly the way she liked it.

"Alright listen up, Barbie. I do not like this kind of thing, so listen closely." Elliot nodded, incapable of formulating a response to his rapid fire speech. She sipped at her coffee, unsure of how Dr Cox managed to drink the scalding hot liquid without so much as wincing. _It probably wasn't macho to show weakness. _Elliotrolled her eyes. "Good. Now, as you will no doubt be aware, due to my overwhelming good looks, I'm a man. Since Natalie and her blacker half are the closest thing you have, in your limited circle, to male friends, then I should explain that I can't speak so quickly _that my words all squish together like some kind of unintelligible string and become so high pitched that nobody can understand what I say whenever I want to talk about something stressful._"

He drew breath. Even though he had been mocking her, Elliot was strangely impressed.

"That's true, yes."

"Right. Anyway Barboo, I appreciate what you did for me. _Really_. I mean, who would have thought, that being as painfully thin as you are, you'd be a pretty decent cook-"

"Is this going anywhere in particular?" Elliot was sick of the way he continued to insult her as though nothing had changed, and she couldn't stand how even when attempting to thank her, he was so rude. Realising that he had touched a raw nerve, Dr Cox became more serious.

"Yes. I'm sorry." He ground out the words as though they were painful, which, as Elliot supposed, they were. "You made darn sure that I listened to every message Jack left on my phone, you covered my shifts, and you kept my entire life above board. Why would you do that?"

There was an intense curiosity behind his eyes. The question threw her off guard, and Elliot looked down into the depths of her cup. Why _had_ she done it? It hadn't occurred to her that she could do otherwise or even that she would want to.

"Because no matter how much of a bastard you are, you always pull through in the end." She drank the last of her coffee. "I wanted to. I couldn't have done anything else." Perry frowned slightly, opening his mouth, but Elliot pre-empted his words. "And no Republican jokes."

"Fair enough. But didn't your beloved boyfriend mind that you were neglecting him to take care of me? _Not_ that I care – I need something to rub in Keith's face, mentally, that is."

The question made Elliot recognise a truth she hadn't been willing to acknowledge; she hadn't missed Keith at all, and spending time with him was becoming an obligation. Unwilling to let him know what she was thinking, Elliot smiled at Dr Cox.

"Ah... not too much, no." She coughed, knowing that her lie was obvious. _Frick_. Dr Cox raised his eyebrows but did not comment. "How's Jack about the whole thing?"

"He's too little to understand, God love him. I'm taking him to the zoo this weekend. If anything tells you that he's Jordan's son, it's his sadistic urge to watch animals stuck in cages. I have to salute the little guy for managing to resist a bribe of toys to make him agree to watch the game." There was a deep affection in his eyes for Jack, and it was very sweet to see, but Elliot knew better than to comment.

"That's... um... great, I guess. Have a good time, and whatever you do, don't let him climb into the lion enclosure." Elliot flushed under the incredulous look he flashed her. "Well a friend of mine went to the zoo with his friends, and they all dared him to go into the lion enclosure, so he did. Anyway, the lion smelled his cologne and attacked him. Well, tried to. Sexually."

"I am... at an actual loss for words here, Barbie. Did he survive this sojourn into the territory of a wild animal?"

"Yeah. But the scarring was pretty bad from the lion's claws and he-" Elliot sighed, aware that Dr Cox had predicted the end. "He killed himself the next month."

"Wow." He drank the last of his coffee and stood. "Well thank you... Elliot."

"You're welcome." She sat in shock as Dr Cox walked towards the cafeteria door. _He had called her Elliot_. In a way, she knew it was pathetic for her to be happy about this small victory, but Elliot didn't care. He respected her.

"Hey, Barbie, are you planning on, you know, going home tonight? Because your shift's finished now." Perry shook his head impatiently. Realising that she had been sitting grinning like an idiot, Elliot stood and followed him quickly.

It didn't matter that he was calling her Barbie again, because once was all that she had needed to know that Dr Cox valued her, which was a good feeling.

**OoOoO**

**Thanks for reading. Please review.**


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